Or does this Kay Jewelers commercial really miss the mark?
Where to begin? How about the setup? The commercial opens up on a crack of lightning as it reveals a lonely abode in the middle of the woods. Sound familiar? Maybe because it's reminiscent of the opening of Scream. Anyone else smelling the burning Jiffy Pop on the stove? Anyone else yelling Run, girl, run! at the screen? It doesn't help that the man's low vocal tones read more creepy crank caller than soothing sweetheart.
The kicker of course is, after another crack of lightning, the frightened female reactively clings to the man. He slyly chuckles, I'm right here. And on a dime, he drops his smile and tone, and channeling a voice better suited for a character dubbed "The Collector" or "The Obsessed One", menacingly murmurs, And I always will be.
OMG! Girl, why aren't you running? Grab a flaming log, throw it behind you and run down those stairs and into the woods!
What is it with this commercial? Does our obsessed kidnapper need to shave? Or is it the tight angle that does him no favors? I guess the angle is meant to capture her reaction but of course, coupled with his dark tone, her face reads as nervous trepidation. And I know it's not just me because even the guy who posted the commercial dubs it "Every Kiss Begins with...STAB!"
The only thing that briefly relieves us is the canned footage of the Kay jewelers store in some milquetoast mall coupled with the catalog page of the featured necklace, somewhat ironically entitled "Love's Embrace". Why don't they just ice this cake and call it "Love's Lock" or "Love's Grip" at this point? When she responds, Don't let go...ever, is anyone else thinking Stockholm syndrome?
Run, girl, run.
Ech. Good luck with the sales on this one, Kay.
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3 comments:
Hah! The "...and I always will be" was probably a line screw up -- I think he was supposed to say, "...and I always will be, my precious!"
Hey, so it wasn't until a year or two ago that I realized that "every kiss begins with Kay" is a pun, because, you know, the word "kiss" begins with "k."
I always figured they were just saying if you want to get kissed, you have to hand over some jewelry from Kay Jewelers.
At the same dinner where the whole "kiss begins with k" thing was explained to me, someone also pointed out that Arby's is called Arby's because they sell roast beef sandwiches -- you know, RB sandwiches. RBs.
Originally he said "WHY DON'T YOU RETURN MY CALLS!!"
But they thought that was too much.
OMG Fran that was a brilliant post!
Nice work!
I have been thinking the SAME thing!!! LOL! I told Kirk that it wouldn't be a good idea to get me anything that would come in a Kay Jewelers box.
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