Encouraging for week 5

I was nervous getting on the scale this morning because I went over my allowed extra 35 points by at least 10 points this week. I don't know what I was thinking getting these cans of Pringles chips (I know, they're not even real potato chips) this week. But I finished off 3 cans (I didn't necessarily start them or eat them alone) this week. Dumb, blind, bored eating late at night. And when I finally climbed into bed with my salty, bloated belly, I was totally mad at myself for it. I finally was able to stop when I declared to my daughter that if I ate another chip last night I was going to give her a dollar. Amazingly, I was able to put the lid back on.

Fortunately, I got a little mercy from the WW gods and managed to still lose 2.5 pounds and weigh in at 156.5. 9 down, 16 to go. It was good fortune because I was starting to feel I couldn't keep this up and if I gained weight this week, I might have easily said, screw this, it's too much. So this was very encouraging and I'm feeling a little fortified to stick with it a bit longer.

At least another week...

sometimes the unexpected happens

The 3rd ranked female (Sharapova) has been defeated by the 154th ranked female (Kudryatvseva) at Wimbledon today.

Every once in a while I'm reminded that the odds-on thing NOT to happen, happens.

Just a note to some folks out there: keep trying.

The road to hell is paved

by me, apparently. After surviving some personal turmoil, I really got to thinking about the saying, "The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

I used to think the word intention in the saying was defined as "purpose". For example, I told Mrs. Doe that I saw Mr. Doe and his buxom secretary, Judy McBooty, entering a motel room laughing and clutching a bottle of Cold Duck and a Whitman's Sampler. My intention or purpose was to advise Mrs. Doe that Mr. Doe has not been honest with her about their married life. Instead, however, Mrs. Doe comes up to me and screams, how dare I stick my nose where it doesn't belong, that Ms. McBooty was a one-time fling that apparently didn't mean anything and now their marriage and home is broken, with everyone thoroughly unhappy, including their innocent children. That's where a keen observer would chide me, muttering under his breath, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. That is, though my intention was good, I've done more destruction than enlightenment.

But now I've heard that the word intention in that prolific saying is supposed to be defined as "a course of action one expects oneself to follow". So following the same example, I intended to tell Mrs. Doe about Mr. Doe and his secretary, Ms. McBooty, but I didn't get around to it, I didn't have the stones to do it when I had the time, I wasn't up for it, etc. Eventually, Mrs. Doe comes up to me and says that Mr. Doe has absconded with their life savings and run off with some Ms. McBooty and Mrs. Doe found out she caught Herpes Simplex 10 from her philandering husband. And when I sheepishly confess, yeah, I meant to tell you about that...she will proceed to curse me to blazes. Again, a keen observer character would come out of the woodwork to chide me, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. That is, I did no good merely intending to do something and my inaction led to something worse.

So which is it? Frankly between the two, I think it simply comes down to: damned if you do, damned if you don't. There's hell to pay either way.

Or perhaps I'm missing another interpretation?

Open to suggestions

I used to upload to the Costco.com photo center because their prints are cheap and I could pick them up the same or next day. It also has the "share" option as well, which is ideal because I want to share Velina's class party pictures with the other parents. Currently, however, they're transitioning into a new system where I cannot share any albums and worse, their new uploader requires some java update which the hamster who runs the wheel in my old PC refuses to accept.

Anybody recommend an online photo center? Here's my wish list:

- the ability to share pictures
- the ability to pick up pictures locally, inexpensively

So far based on my need to pick up pictures the same or next day, Shutterfly is the leading prospect.

I'd love any other recommendations!

Broke 160

It's been 4 weeks of diligent Poing counting (well, I goofed a couple of days) and meeting my 120 minutes of cardio a week goal (which I copied from Paul) and I weighed in at 159 this morning. That's 6.5 pounds and it's already felt significant.

But there are days where I just get so tired of recording everything I eat. They say it's a lifestyle change but right now I get exhausted thinking of doing this forever. I know this Point counting and cardio isn't a prison sentence which I get to leave and ignore once I reach my goal weight. But I hope I get to relax a little. Or it just gets ingrained in my body memory and I don't think of watching what I eat as such an onerous task.

Oh well, I guess I'll see when I get there. Which will be a while. Still 19 pounds to go...

Happy Daddy's Day

With a homemade card, pizza, and an Indiana Jones matinee with his lady, his girl, and his own mom, what more could a dad want?

None more. But this sweet loot sure was icing on the cake--


Hope everyone had a good Father's Day.

Hitting the road

Driving 4-5 hours up near Fresno for memorial services for Kyle today. An executive decision was made to close the office for the day in honor of Kyle's memory. More than half the office is going up and the company is kindly reimbursing us rental cars to carpool the 500 mile round trip.

Updated:

So glad (is that the right word?) I went. Sure, I cried. A lot. But it was so moving to hear the words and memories of the family, fiancee, and friends, to see the hundreds of people moved to be there, and to see the slideshow of pictures of him throughout his life. Some pictures and stories made me smile and laugh--like the one where he wanted to surprise his fiancee and hid in another room for 45 minutes and her sister had to finally prompt his fiancee to go in the other room to be surprised. But the mother in me nearly blubbered like a baby when I saw the family portraits. And the pictures of him as a child sleeping.

At the end of the slideshow, everyone was invited to go up for a final viewing and to give our respects to his family. Some folks were reluctant to see the body but in some ways, I really needed to. I'd been plagued by a weird delusion that Kyle would lope back into the office one of these days. I guess that's part of the denial stage I hear about. For better or worse, my brain needed some proof that this was for real.

I went up and saw him. I didn't have the stamina that I thought I'd have to really look at him, not more than to recognize Kyle in what looked like a reluctant nap. I turned and realized I was facing his mother. Her expression revealed she had no idea who I was and that I really should have flat-ironed my hair or done something with it when I got up at 4am. I could only manage to stammer that I was a co-worker and how sorry I was for her loss...she nodded and said thank you. His father's face also searched for explanation who I was and I hoarsely repeated what I said to Kyle's mother. He took my hand and said thank you for taking the time to come up. I immediately lost any iota of composure and blubbered, thanking him for the opportunity to be there and he started to tear up and I moved on to the grandparents who so kindly thanked me for coming. At this point, as I saw the fiancee and his brothers, I was weepy, barely coherent, trying to express the kind words Kyle had spoken of them. Unfortunately, I'm sure I came across as this sobbing fool who really should have done something with her hair.

We all left shortly after because a lot of folks in the carpools had commitments back home. In my car, while talking about the memorial, relating what moved us and what made us smile, there it was--a bit of comfort.