Currently, my hair is on the long side. And I'm reaching that point where it's starting to get caught in shoulder bag handles and a ponytail feels pretty heavy--like it's plucking the hairs off the front of my head. Usually at this point, in the past, I reflexively chop a good chunk off, like I did for Halloween--always feels like I lose about 10 pounds of hair. But then at that length, I feel like my hair evolves into some version of soccer mom hair. Which truth be told, isn't the worst thing in the world, but I have plenty of years ahead of me to wield that sensible style and amass Teddy Bear University sweatshirts.
I often recall my mother's opinion when I had long hair growing up, which was simply, you look like a barbarian. It would seem my indifference to a comb or brush started early. I inherited my hair from her--thick and very, very coarse--not too unlike the bristles on a brush for scrubbing barbecue grills. Looking back on it, I'm pretty sure my aversion to meticulous combing was not only based on laziness, but was also the result of watching my mother sharply cut, shape, and style her hair into what is often referred to as the "China Chop" (aka, classic Asian bob with heavy bangs). I also deemed it a prototype for a motorcycle helmet and therefore had thorough reluctance in cultivating this smooth look.
Another issue with long hair for me is that due to apathy and cheapness, more and more of my gray hair is coming through. Given the stated uncombed coarseness of my hair, soon this will put me a ratty shawl, warty chin, and long crooked finger away from trying to lure children into my gingerbread house. I'm all for challenging paradigms of what's expected of women as they age, but it seems there is an age where visually, a long-haired woman jumps from hot mama to missing fourth wife in a polygamous religious sect.
And this is not too say I wouldn't love to have really short, short hair. If I had good face, I'd love to have a pixie cut but unfortunately, I don't. A short pixie haircut with my coarse hair and my fairly androgynous face would make me downright mannish. I'm not exaggerating when I say I would seriously look like a drag queen who fell in a river and lost his wig and makeup. I'm truly jealous of all my friends who have the good face for really short hair.
So that brings me back to this--
Barbarian in a cardigan
Do I keep my hair long or lop off a few pounds?
1 comment:
omg you're hilarious. mmm... ok maybe cut a little, but thin it out. my hair's kinda like yours, and i have to thin it otherwise there's so much of it. then you can pony it without looking like you got a face lift.
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